"Tell-Tale Heart" Police Report

RD due: Tuesday, Oct. 11
FD due: Thursday, Oct. 13 

Instead of posting the example I shared with you in class today, I've listed some examples for showing writing and links to sites that will help you get a sense of an authentic police report.




Showing Language vs. Telling Language

• What kind of police person are you? Compassionate? Aggressive? Loud? Patient? New at your job? An older, seasoned veteran? How will you convey these traits?

• What about the suspect? How can you accurately capture his emotions as expressed through his actions?

Make a point of using "showing language," not "telling language." If you tell someone something, it doesn't involve much detail, and s/he won't be able to imagine it clearly. What you've shared remains an abstract idea. However, if you show what you mean to say through vivid detail, you give evidence (details) that make the image concrete.


Think of showing language as writing that could be recorded or filmed. In other words, it could be proven by any of the senses (taste, touch, sound, sight, smell).


Examples:

Telling:

The soldier was impressive. (Note: If possible, avoid beginning with "S/he was...")

Showing:

Ed, a stocky, barrel-chested man in his thirties, marched into the room and took command of the situation as he announced in his booming voice, "Alright. Attention, everyone."


Telling: 
He was nervous.

Showing:

Arms flailing, he paced the length of the room wildly. Finally, he sat in the ancient, rickety chair I offered him, but his left eye twitched uncontrollably. Hearing him speak was painful; his voice quivered, and words came slowly as if he were just  recovering long-lost language skills.

Telling:

The car went around the corner.

Showing:

The sleek beast of a car careened violently around the corner at Ojai Ave. and Signal Street, leaving only a streak of light and a gasp of exhaust in its path.

Writing a Police Report:


If you're interested in writing a more authentic-seeming police report, check these links:

"How to Write a Police Report"
http://www.ehow.com/how_4441251_write-police-report.html


"How to Write a Great Police Report"
http://www.ehow.com/how_5461354_write-great-police-report.html

"How to Write a Police Report Narrative"
http://www.ehow.co.uk/how_6063691_write-police-report-narrative.html


Extra Credit: Email me with this in the subject line: Yogi Bear.